Hi all, this is my first fan fic, so please take it easy on the grading scale.
by Taylor Clark
Summers are always hot at the 4077, this summer was no exception. With no expected casualties the members of the 4077 were able to rest, relax and party.
Trapper John decided that since his hangover had gone away he would go do some nurse hunting. "Hey Hawk..Hawkeye, I'm going fishing you wanna come along" he said. "No I got a date" replied Hawkeye. "Tell me who she is, so I know to avoid her" said Trapper, "I don't know yet" Hawkeye said with a sarcastic tone.
After about five more minutes of pointless jabbering Trapper gathered his bag and left. Hawkeye also left, but instead of going out and finding a nurse he thought he'd try his new plan of attack, let them come to him. With only his bath robe on he strolled over to the mess tent where they were serving fish and liver for the eighth day in a row. "AGAIN" Hawkeye yelled, "I don't know how much longer I can survive on fish and liver, especially since I'm throwing it all away" he said. "Hawkeye get over here" said Henry, "I'm having the worst hangover since I drank that half a keg of that nasty beer they sent us, and your yelling sure as hell ain't helping" Henry said softly but seriously. "Henry I gotta get outta here" pleaded Hawkeye, "Can me and Trap spend a couple days in Tokyo, I promise we won't ask General Hammond's wife if she wants to play leap frog naked." A slight pause in the conversation occurred. Finally Henry agreed to let them go for three days.
Hawkeye hurried out of the Mess tent to let Trapper know that he had gotten them three days in heaven. As Hawkeye was walking through the camp he ran into Frank Burns. Frank, as always, found something wrong with Hawkeye, but Hawkeye let Frank know that he was not going to change anything unless Frank left Korea.
Finally after a half hour of searching Hawkeye found Trapper, "Hey Trapper guess what" he said. Before he could finish talking Trapper interrupted and said "Hey I just found the prettiest new nurse, I think I'm gonna go break her in." "Not now" Hawkeye replied, "We're going to Tokyo." "What" Trapper said with a very excited tone. "If ur joking I'm gonna kill you," "pack your bags, we gotta catch a chopper" Hawkeye said.
Hawkeye and Trapper packed as fast as they could and were off to Tokyo. "What did you pack?" Hawkeye asked. "Two pairs of underwear, you?" replied Trapper. "I only brought one, I was gonna steal yours."
Once they arrived in Seoul via helicopter they boarded a plane and left for Tokyo. The plane ride to Tokyo was relatively smooth, except when Hawkeye decided it was okay for him to flirt with a generals wife, and when Trapper used a Colonel's hat for a napkin.
When they arrived in Tokyo the first place they went was to their hotel. They dropped off their stuff and hit the local bar. While in the bar they met two American women named Mary and Wanda who had nowhere to stay. "Boy did we score on this one" said Trapper. "We haven't scored yet" replied Hawkeye, "Are you going to ask if they want to stay with us?" Before Trapper could answer Wanda asked if they had a place to stay. "You better believe it" Trapper replied, "you wanna share a room with us, it will only cost you your virgi.." "What my friend is trying to say is, it will only cost you dinner" Hawkeye interrupted. "Deal" said Mary. They all left the bar drunker than they had ever been before.
When they got to their rooms they received a phone call form Henry telling them to attend a medical class that was being instructed by a Charles Emerson Winchester III. Hawkeye refused, but Henry insisted that they owed him. Hawkeye and Trapper reluctantly agreed to attend.
The next day they had to wake up at 5:00 in the morning to get ready for the meeting. At 6:00 they headed to the Tokyo General Hospital where they met up with various doctors stationed all over the Pacific theater.
The meeting started at 7:30, when Charles walking in a half hour late. "What took so long Charlie?" Hawkeye asked. "Its Charles, and I was perfecting my speech" Charles replied. "You didn't have to do that" Trapper said sarcastically. "Yes I did, you see I do one thing, I do it very well and I move on" Charles replied with an angry tone. The meeting went on for twelve hours, but Hawkeye and Trapper left after three to go for a short break. They never returned.
After they left the meeting, Hawkeye and Trapper both went back to the hotel to spend a few hours with their nurse friends. Unfortunately they had left. "They took a pair of my underwear" Trapper said. "Maybe that because you ripped up Mary's pair with your teeth last night" Hawkeye said while trying to hold in a laugh.
After getting some lunch Hawkeye and Trapper decided to spend awhile sleeping since they had not gotten much sleep the past two days.
"HAWKEYE WAKE UP" Trapper yelled, "ITS NINE O'CLOCK IN THE MORNING, OUR PLANE LEAVES IN TWO HOURS." "Ohh man, I wanted to get drunk one more time" Hawkeye said while half asleep. "Come on lets go, we'll get drunk on the plane."
The two of them packed up and rushed to the airport as fast as they could. They made it just in time.
While on the plane they did just what they planned on doing, they drank and drank until they passed out. The next day they woke up in a jeep in Seoul. "Where the hell are we" Hawkeye said. "Your on your way back to the 4077" said a blurry figure, "I'm John, I'll have you there in about an hour." "Where were we" Trapper said. "Boy you guys must have gotten drunk out of your minds, you were in Tokyo for three days" the driver told them. "I don't remember one minute of it" Hawkeye said, "me either" Trapper replied.
When they arrived home they were greeted by Henry. "So how was the meeting?" he asked. "What meeting?" Hawkeye replied. "I TOLD YOU TO ATTEND THAT MEETING, NOW WHY DIDN'T YOU?" Henry yelled. "Henry we don't remember one minute of anything" Trapper relied. "Does the name Charles ring a bell?" Henry asked. "Never heard of him" Hawkeye replied.