Note: This story deals with the very serious issue of suicide. Suicide is not the solution to anything under any circumstances.

Hidden Feelings
(An alternate ending to the episode "Bombed")

by MK McIntrye

This starts after Margaret and Trapper come out of the supply tent after making 196 degrees.

The operating room had been loud and full for the past 5 hours, with no hint of calming down.

"Clamp" Trapper called to Margaret.

"Clamp" she responded, her voice strong. Then she became quieter. "Doctor after this is all over, could I talk to you, in private?"

"Sure honey, after this is over. Retractor!"

"Retractor" she said.

This is went on for several more hours and then finally they were out of wounded.

Trapper and Margaret went into the swamp. Frank was on post-op duty and Hawkeye was trying to score a date with one of the new nurses who had just arrived.

Trapper poured drinks and they sat down.

"Now what is it that you want to talk to me about Major?" he asked.

"Well, umm, well it's about today, in the supply tent. I really shouldn't have gone all to pieces like that, and definitely not in front of you."

"Major, Margaret, its okay really, we all break down sometimes yourself just happened to be in the middle of a war. And I was the only one there, no one else saw you cry."

"I know, I know, but I," she looked into his eyes, "I also think that I let myself get to close to you. I wanted to kiss you so much. Trapper I think I," she was cut off.

Trapper stood up and turned away from her.

"You can't Margaret, you can't. I'm married, I mean Frank's married but that's different."

"Who said anything about Frank? Trapper I think I love you."

"Oh god Margaret" he said sitting back down and facing her again. "I think I love you too." He reached out and touched her hand.

"Ha! I knew I would find you two love birds together again," said Hawkeye as he walked into the tent.

"Umm, Hawk, I thought you had a date or something?" said Trapper nervously.

"I did, but apparently the other nurses warned her against me! Can you believe that!" he walked over to the still and poured himself a drink.

"Well, umm thank you, for the talk on Private Simmons captain, I go on duty now so I will be checking on him," said Margaret rising and rushing to the door.

"Margaret, I umm, can I stop by your tent tomorrow?" Trapper asked, Hawkeye turned around and grinned to himself.

"Of course, my door is always open." And with that she left.

"Private Simmons....right" Hawkeye said, "you wanna tell me what is really going on here Trap."

"Nothing Hawk. Nothing. You know Margaret and you know me."

"Yeah and I know Henry and Radar but they aren't sneaking around together."

"We aren't sneaking around Hawkeye so just leave it alone ok?" Trapper laid down in his cot. He went to sleep happily dreaming of Margaret but his dream soon turned into a nightmare.

He grabbed Frank's gun from his footlocker and ran to Margaret's tent.

"Major" he said opening her door and walking in.

"Trapper, my god what is it, are you alright?" she said wrapping her robe around her.

"No, I'm not. I love you Margaret, with everything I am. But I can't leave my wife. And my daughters. I can't!" he was almost screaming.

"I'm not asking you to John" she said trying to comfort him.

"God don't call me that, no one calls me that here! Margaret I can't live without you, but I can't leave my girls. You don't understand how hard this is Margaret, I've loved you more than anyone for the past year. But now I, I just can't live." He collapsed on the floor and then revealed the pistol in his hand.

"Oh god no Trapper, don't" screamed Margaret.

But she couldn't stop him. He lay on the floor, dead and life less.

Hawkeye then ran into the camp. "Oh my god, what the hell happened? Margaret what happened?"

"He, oh my god, he shot himself Hawkeye, right here, just now, she shot himself," Margaret was still hysterical. She bent over his body and began to cry. Hawkeye then knelt beside her and began to cry as well, their best friend was gone.

The End